by way of pace and green
“I knew I was meant to be green”
And it was REALLY GREEN like emerald meets the heart of a lizard green…I am the heart of a
lizard I mean.
When I walk down streets my green reflects in car windows and shop store fronts, I slow my
step microscopically so as to catch myself but no one else can see me.
I am still, like a lizard on a branch that catches your eye but before you know it she is
swimming in your pool.
Or so I hope to be one day.
Still I am green, my roots grow dark like the bark I would sun bath on
My ends blending into a dull symphony of my favorite ice cream flavor…mint of course
Still am I green? I’ll be the girl with green hair I say
“I love your blue hair” the little Dutch girl says, it takes everything in me not to yell
“IT WAS MEANT TO BE GREEN”
Still I am green even if she sees blue
It felt right to be one with the trees one with the leaves one with the seas…
It felt right to not be me
But be me all that much more
I felt vulnerable in a “hey over here” kind of way
My camouflage was meant for a different jungle
Not the hard and cold brick of the space I inhabit but the soft and vibrant dew in which I would
drink in the mornings… if I were a lizard I mean.
Still I am green, as the new year brings new life and new death, as the jungles burn and the
vibrant colors turn red
Maybe it is right that my green fades, just like the forests cull their land to make space for new
growth, maybe it is not right that I stay green all the time…on the outside I mean
With a thinned canopy we are all exposed, we are waiting to grow but timid for there is much
too much space…
Do we feel everything now? Like we didn’t before?
Or do we build new feeling ? New pathways?
I dream in green
I dream to be green
I dream of elephants running paths through luxury resorts because they were there first
Maybe it isn’t about exposure
Maybe the real truth; the real harshness of reality is when we know we are being watched…
I fly when I’m green
I run faster and jump higher when I’m green
I stare at myself longer in the mirror as to conjure up the rest of my true form
If I could just stare hard enough maybe I could truly be.